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If a man is “in between jobs,” his relationships will reflect that instability. Maybe he has just got a promotion at his finance job? He has been told from an early age he will be the provider of his future family, the bread winner, and he needs to utilize his resources and work hard.
If a man is not settled and satisfied in his career, he cannot even begin to think about a serious relationship. Eventually he will be able to live the lifestyle he desires.
My family’s “don’t ask for money” rule stayed with me, unconsciously, into adulthood. I expected the man to read my mind, because I was ashamed to let him know I wanted him to treat. When I did offer to split the check on a dinner date, if the man accepted, I felt unfeminine, which meant no second date. But now I think many men were as confused as I’d been.
So it was difficult for me to talk about money on dates. The guy could have thought I really wanted to pay my way.
Here’s how to answer that question: In order for a man to be ready for a relationship, he needs to be in a great place within his career. Maybe he will go up there to have a beer or tinker around a bit, but even if he begins to build up and decorate the upstairs rooms, he will eventually have to go back downstairs and finish what he started. But whatever his profession may be, in whatever industry or income bracket, in order for a man to be fully immersed and happy in his relationship with you, he needs to be satisfied and succeeding within his career. If a man is not yet at the top of his field, he needs to feel as though he is working toward that goal and that it is in sight before entering a happy, healthy relationship.
Does it matter if you don't have money when you are setting up a date with a woman?
It turns out it does NOT matter -- IF you set up the date properly.
Will he be proactive and work on our problems together, or take the same passive approach that he takes in his career?
It’s a question that warrants careful consideration. When you don’t have a lot of money, you have to ration it carefully.