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Some things are universal don’ts, like dating someone you work with. So is there anyway to make a romantic relationship and a career thrive in the same place?
Psychologist Art Markman helps this reader figure it out.
While an office romance might sound like a recipe for disaster (and in some cases against corporate policy), there are ways to make sure the situation doesn't end in heartbreak or employment termination.1. Likewise, avoid starting a relationship with someone who works for you.
There's a good chance the person in the position of power will start giving preferential treatment to his or her partner (even if it's subconscious), and other employees may become resentful.2.
Don't date someone thinking it will help you get ahead in the job.
Quick backstory: We didn't meet on the job — we were dating for almost four years before we started working together (which, by the way, wasn't planned … But for about 11 months, we sat three cubes apart from one another and kept our relationship under wraps. People sometimes act differently at work than they do in their personal life. No need to send a blast email with "the news" of you and your cube-mate's new relationship.
But they happen all the time, and when they do, there are three possible outcomes: The relationship turns sour and your reputation and career take a beating; it ends, but you're both mature and cordial and don't let the breakup affect your work; or A survey by Career Builder last year revealed that nearly 40% of employees admitted to having a romantic relationship with a coworker, and almost one-third of office relationships result in marriage. We are getting married in two months.) It's up to you to figure out whether pursuing an office relationship is worth the possible consequences, good and bad. My situation was unique because we were already a couple before we started working together — but generally that isn't the case, and Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert and the author of "Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job," suggests you try being friends in-and-outside the office before you make any moves.